Eclectic Kim Review: Third Window Brewing

When picking one of the last places I’ll have the pleasure of having lunch with Derrick before he and his family move to New Zealand, I wanted to pick a place that would be fun and interesting. When I was last up to Santa Barbara, I had a friend that suggested Third Wheel Brewing. Immediately, I ran the idea by Derrick, who said – enthusiastically yes – and we set a date.

The night before, I’d seen Justice play at the Santa Barbara Bowl, and after the high energy of the show, it was a welcome contrast to spend a quiet morning unwinding at The Leta in Goleta. By the time lunch rolled around, I was ready.

When I arrived at Third Window, I was immediately struck by how lively and inviting the space was. It felt laid-back and full of character.

Derrick and I stood at the bar for a little bit while, surveying the beer list. I knew that this would be a two flight situation, as this looked like it could easily turn into a “I found my favorite relatively local brewery” situation.

For the first round, I had the following beers:

F.E. Pilsner (ABV: 5.1% – Pilsner)
West Coast IPA (ABV: 6.9% – West Coast IPA)
The Martyr (IX) (ABV: 9.2% – Abbey Style Tripel)
L’eveaire (ABV: 5.0% – Foeder fermented Wit w/ Raspberries)
Java Lamp (ABV: 4.9 % – Nitro Golden Ale w/ Handlebar coffee)

Along with a very delicious FP RANCH WAGYU TEXAS STYLE BBQ – TRI-TIP TACO.

Over beers and lunch, we settled into an easy rhythm talking about politics, laughing about the absurdness of certain situations, remembering our history together and just reflecting on the power of endearing friendship.

There was a quiet ache underneath it all. I tried to deny it and push it away – but it was there. It was the grief of knowing that something familiar, something constant and reliable – is ending.

I’ve known Derrick since middle school. I’ve seen him grow, fall in love, become a father. I’ve met his kids as babies and watched the possibilities of life unfold. And now – I’m watching them all move across the world and into something new.

I’m so happy for his adventure and for the life he’s building. But, that also means grieving and facing exactly what I’m letting go of. I am losing the ease of our meetups, the sound of conversation, the ease of hearing about his kid’s newest accomplishments, seeing his wife and the comfort of knowing he’s always just a drive away.

With my friend Matt also leaving Los Angeles to move to Rochester with his husband – it’s just hard. Saying goodbye is just….. getting easier as I get older. Because, it keeps happening. Life – continues.

For the second round, I had the following beers:

Oatey McOatface (ABV: 5.2% – Oatmeal Stout)
Lightning of Dioscorus (ABV: 10.0% – Abbey Style Quad)
Oak Aged Quad (ABV: 10.0% – Abbey Style Quad aged in New French Oak Barrels)
Bierbara XI (ABV: 12.0% – BBA quad w/ dried cherries, vanilla, and cacao nibs)
Bourbon Barrel Aged Walkabout (ABV: 11.0% – BBA stout w/ chocolate, vanilla, and orange)

And a HOUSE BAKED CHOCOLATE CHIP COOKIE.

We had great conversations over delicious beers. It wasn’t a grand farewell. But, it was something smaller and more – us. Maybe – that’s what made it hit subtlety harder when we said goodbye.

There’s still a going-away party, of course. But this was the goodbye that mattered.

Friendships change. They evolve. They stretch across oceans. And while I’ll miss the shape ours once had, I’m holding space for what it will become. But I’ll feel this sadness and be aware of it. This is the ache of losing something good, even as I celebrate all that’s ahead for him.

This is what it means to love someone: to cheer for their future, even as you mourn the pieces of the past you’re leaving behind.